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Jul. 6th, 2008

update and oh so much more


the fourth of july was fuh-uhn.  i started off the day at phillip's.   basically, i just hung out with the family.  drank a little beer, had a little bbq, and played some washers.  kelsee wanted me to go to gary's thing with her, because she was scared to go meet all his fam alone.  i decided that this would be fun because whitney would be there and i thought it would be fun to drink with her.  i was correct.  plus, i got hit on by like three of her family members.  it almost irritated me, though.  for some reason, i don't like it when guys like gawk or hit on me when i don't feel like i look my best.  but when i DO feel like i look my best they don't always approach.  maybe they're scared.  who knows.  anyway.  all i know is that i was there to just hang and it irritated me that i was getting hit on.  and i just realized tonight that one of the guys used a larry the cable guy line on me.  seriously...

the rodeo was phenomenal.  i got a sweeeet cowboy hat.  and i rocked it.  also, hot cowboys.  yuM.  i saw one that looked like george strait, but younger.  total hotness.  i'm really excited for next year's already!

i worked all day today.  nine to five.  and tomorrow i'm working...eleven to nine.  crazyassness.  oh well.  i need to since i had all those days off. 

i'm really proud of myself because i just went for a run.  yes, it's eleven o' clock at night, but i figured it was better than nothing.  i keep telling myself that i'm going to get up in the morning before work and exercise, but it never happens.  i've finally just came to the realization that i've never been a morning person.  i'm much more alive at night, so it's good that i went now.  i would have just stayed up late tonight anyway...and like ate or something.  so this is much better.  as i was running i decided that i need to have a list of goals to work on until the end of summer.  i've kinda let things go downhill.  so here are my goals in no particular order of importance.

i must quit smoking.  it makes me sound funny and i always have phlegm in my throat.  plus it smells bad, makes it hard to run, and is expensive.  oh, and it causes cancer.

i should totally try to run at least three times a week.  i'm trying to work up to about three miles for right now.  i feel like that's an acceptable goal to work for by the time school starts again.  ultimitely, i'd like to run a 5k next summer and a 10k the following summer.

on the in between days i'm going to try to do some other kind of work out.  i should probably try to incorporate weights at some point, but that's not really a top priority for me at the moment.  

i also really need to work on watching what i eat.  working at taco bell is definitely a big deterrent from doing this, but i have to make myself.  i think that i should just make myself eat ONLY fresco items.  i would say something about drinking in this goal, too, but honestly i really haven't drank all that often this summer, so it shouldn't be that big of a problem.  i just need to make sure i don't eat super unhealthy things (as in, lean more towards fruits and veggies) and watch portion sizes.  AND only eat when i'm hungry/not out of boredom.

work on getting my tan rockin' again.

i really need to make myself work at least 40 hours a week for the rest of the summer.  and if i'm going to work any overtime it needs to be at least five hours.  otherwise, taxes just screw me over.  and with all of this wonderful money i'll be making i need to save at LEAST 500 by the end of the summer.  being an adult with your own financial situation to worry about is stressful.

i think these goals are sufficient to get me through the rest of the summer.  it'll give me something to concentrate on besides being down on myself for feeling fat or wondering why dumbass isn't talking to me.  i think focusing on positive changes instead of dwelling on shit will be a lot more productive.  normally i give myself a goal amount of weight to lose, but i'm not going to do this this time.  obviously, i look okay if i had guys hitting on me the other night.  i just FEEL gross.  so i'm going to work on making myself feel better and getting back into my favorite jeans.  or having them fit a little less snuggly, anyway.  this will obviously be the result of some weightloss, but who knows how much.

okay.  i've GOT to go take a shower.


p.s. i found my old phone tonight!  i'm going to go have my number switched to it tomorrow, because even though it's older than shit, i like it a lot better than the one i have right now.  it's red and cute and i can actually hear it when it rings.  half the time the phone i have now doesn't even ring when it's supposed to.  annoying.  i guess i shouldn't have dropped it so much.

Jul. 4th, 2008

chinese and chick flicks

yesterday was six flags.  glorious!  i didn't get to see TBF, but oh well.  i saw little davey, which was completely random.  all of the rides were amazing.  and dawn and i did the dragon's wing.  such a rush.  it's absolutely amazing.  it's because of that that i'm going to go sky diving someday.  i told steve that i'd done it again and we decided that we have to do it at least two more times before the summer's over.

we were getting ready to leave six flags and it started raining.  not just a little rain.  sheets of rain.  there were security guards at the gates that weren't letting people leave because tornados had been spotted in the area or something.  i thought i was going to die.  but it's okay.  i didn't.  =]  we all had to end up going to walmart to get new clothes because there was no way i was riding home as drenched as i was.

all in all, fun day, though.

today was incredibly relaxing.  i didn't wake up until about 2.  then i just read for like 3 hours.  amy called and we went to walmart & then to chinese.  yuuuum.  i <3 hunans.  we got tickets for the rodeo on saturday too.  

i pretty much spent the rest of the night watching movies with mom.  we got p.s. i love you and the other boyelyn girl.  p.s. i love you was sooo very good.  i didn't think all that much of the other boyelyn girl.  i'm pretty sure it's because i read the book a few months ago.  but, yeah.  gotta rest up for the fourth tomorrow!


Writer's Block: Getting Closer Than Perhaps Expected

Have you ever crushed on your closest friend? Did you keep it secret, were there problems or did it blossom into something more?
funny you should ask.

i had this stupid crush for 2 years one one of my best friends.  i kept it a "secret" forever.  it was, like, painfully obvious, though.  everyone else knew about it, but he didn't.  finally, the situation was driving me absolutely crazy so everything came out.  he had a girlfriend so...but we're still really close.  and things are suprisingly not weird.

Jul. 2nd, 2008

today is the first day of the rest of your life.

i just held the guinea pigs.  it's really a shame that they make me so damn itchy.  i love them, though.  so i'll just be itchy.

our house is an absolute disaster right now.  we're getting new carpet tomorrow, so everything's crammed in the kitchen and dining room and it's all echo-y.  i stayed gone for most of the day so i would at least have somewhere to sit.

i got new moon today!   it's goooood.  mmm edward cullen.  he's kinda being a bitch, though.

six flags tomorrow with tb bitcheS!  it shall be fabulous.  joe-boi even bought us soda for the ride.  he's too damn cute.  i <3 him.

the first day off went good.  except for when i snapped awake and thought i was late for work.

silly me.

oh oh.  i forgot.  kylie and i played donkey kong 3 for, like, hours tonight.  it was pretty much amazing.  i forgot how fun video games were.  well, certain ones, anyway.  like donkey kong 3 and mario.  you will not get me to play halo.  huh uh, no sir.


Jul. 1st, 2008

i love these damn soundtrack things

If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your media player's library.
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question, type the song that's playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button.
6. Don't lie.

Opening credits: homewrecker - gretchen wilson

Waking up: i don't know - usher & p. diddy

First day of school: bang bang - cher

Falling in love: take the money and run - steve miller band...loves it

Fight song: good ride cowboy - garth brooks

Breaking up: learning to live again - garth again

Getting back together: larger than life - backstreet boys

Prom: first time - lifehouse

Life: angel - amanda perez

Mental breakdown: me & you -cassie

Driving: take me there - rascal flatts

Flashback: midwest choppers - tech n9ne

Wedding: wrong way - sublime.,..haha that's no good.

Birth of a child: it's beginning to look a lot like christmas...?

Final Battle: give it to me baby - rick james

Death scene: thrash unreal - against me!

Writer's Block: Awesome Openers

What are some gripping opening lines from films or books, and why do you think they work so well?

 "Once upon a midnight dreary, while i pondered weak and weary,"
-Poe, "The Raven"

I know it's a poem, and not a movie or book, but it's still awesome.  One of my all time favorites.  It definitely draws your right in.

"that was the summer of 1963 - when everybody called me Baby, and it didn't occur to me to mind.  That was before President Kennedy was shot, before the Beatles came, when i couldn't wait to join the Peace Corps, and i thought i'd never find a guy as great as my dad."  -Baby, Dirty Dancing

I absolutely LOVE this line.  It makes me happy in a nostalgic sort of way.  Not that I was even alive at that point in time, but it just kind of takes you back to that one summer that seemed perfect and endless.

Jun. 30th, 2008

for the first time

so.  i've never had a livejournal before.   but i felt like journaling and i didn't have an empty notebook, so i figured this was good enough.

things have been kind of rough lately.  i think i feel like that just because things aren't going the way i want them to.  not that i always get whatever i want, but i usually work to make things happen the way that i feel that they should.  and that just doesn't seem to be good enough at the moment.  i just feel stuck.  i'm at a job i don't necessarily like anymore.  don't get me wrong, i LOVE the people i work with, i just feel like i've outgrown the job.  then there's the financial situation.  bah.  it's not as bad as it could be, i just hate having it hanging over my head.  say no to plastic money, guys.  i'm semi-worried about going back to school.  not because of the classes necessarily, although that will be a bitch for sure.  the off-campus living should be interesting.  it's already proving to be.  i can't wait to see everyone though.  i miss steve a lot more than i realized at first.  but i guess that's kind of to be expected after we spent pretty much every waking hour together last semester.  aaaand most of all the boy thing.  it's ridiculous how much i've been let down in the past two years.  and i feel like it's stupid for me to even be concerned about it.  i just feel like i have a lot going for me and that i deserve someone who appreciates that.  but, as of now, i haven't found that.  but whatever, i guess.  it'll happen if it happens, and if not...fuck it.

i have the next five days off.  'twill be glorious.  i think i'm going to really try to get some things straight in addition to relaxing and having some fun.  i REALLY needed the time off.  PLUS this will be the first fourth of july that i haven't had to work in three years.  yay for fireworks!  i'm also going to go to six flags on wednesday with some tb bitches and i think amy and i are going to the rodeo on saturday.  cowboys.  yum.  ha...

gaH.  i just feel really restless.  like i need a change.  a really good change.  it's been forever since something really fabulous has happened to me.  i feel like i'm due for some good stuff.  i mean, seriously.

haha...whine whine whine.

i think i'll go read now.  les miserables.  fabulous.  =]